


The Wolf Within

by mishaminion69, sydkn3e



Series: A Broken World [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha Cas, M/M, Omega Dean, Smut, True Mates, a/b/o dynamics, shifting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-27 08:49:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20404969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mishaminion69/pseuds/mishaminion69, https://archiveofourown.org/users/sydkn3e/pseuds/sydkn3e
Summary: The sharp whip of the wind, the varied texture of the ground beneath his feet, the pathway illuminated by moonlight, the urge to sing to it…It was always easiest letting his instincts have control, and Dean often silently mourned the years prior that he wasn’t able to have this freedom. Sometimes, he was envious of Cas in that regard, of all the decades he’d been afforded this luxury, all the years he’d had it before Dean was even a thought. Surrendering to instinct felt so natural, so fulfilling, so...pure. He was one with nature, one with Cas, one with existence. The living, the inanimate, life and death...it all began and ended with him.With them.





	The Wolf Within

**Author's Note:**

> They'reeeee back! 
> 
> Lauren and I are happy to bring you the next installment in our beloved Broken World series.   
Additionally, with this installment comes an announcement. We now have an official Beta reader and editor, Lindsay (@Soloarcana). We both appreciate the ever-loving snot out of you, Linds! Everyone please give Lindsay a warm welcome and thank her for laboring for us!
> 
> And as always, enjoy.
> 
> Love and smut,  
Sydney and Lauren (& Lindsay!)

_ The sharp whip of the wind, the varied texture of the ground beneath his feet, the pathway illuminated by moonlight, the urge to sing to it… _

It was always easiest letting his instincts have control, and Dean often silently mourned the years prior that he wasn’t able to have this freedom. Sometimes, he was envious of Cas in that regard, of all the decades he’d been afforded this luxury, all the years he’d had it before Dean was even a thought. Surrendering to instinct felt so natural, so fulfilling, so... _ pure _ . He was one with nature, one with Cas, one with existence. The living, the inanimate, life and death...it all began and ended with him.

With  _ them. _

It suddenly occurred to him that he’d lost Cas miles ago, easily pulling ahead of the older Alpha, so far ahead by now that the sound of his paws pummeling the earth was the only thing he could hear. They’d started running the night before; a vacation of sorts, leaving Rory with the Banes’ for the duration of their trip at the request of newly-married Tasha and Benny, Jack was with Sam, Eileen, and Maura, and the pups were with Missouri in her cabin, now neighboring Dean and Cas’s.

They hadn’t known where they were going. They were running just to run, stopping when they got tired, hunting together when they got hungry. Cas was bigger and stronger, he was a better hunter and fighter, but Dean was faster, and he had quickly learned a few tricks while hunting that Cas had been very impressed with.

He had no idea how far they’d gone, where they were, or how far outside the walls and safety of Eden they’d journeyed. He imagined Cas knew, since he did this fairly often anyway, but he’d have to ask him whenever the seasoned Alpha caught up to him.

If he let him.

Dean pushed forward, relishing the feel of the wind through his fur, the second nature he now had for the run. A sharp howl broke the silence of the night and Dean’s haunches bristled as it tapered off at the end. Cas was giving him a warning, and he wouldn’t get another. He was closer than Dean suspected, and his sights were set. When Cas decided what he wanted, Dean didn’t stand a chance. It didn’t matter how much faster he was.

Dean took a sharp turn, paws slipping in the thick layer of wet leaves on the forest floor. He lost his footing momentarily but quickly regained his equilibrium and surged forward, weaving in and out of trees, following small brush-covered pathways. 

He broke free of the trees and was suddenly standing in a clearing that struck him as familiar, a small creek babbling somewhere nearby. Dean froze, sliding to a halt, and sniffed hesitantly at the air. His scent was faint, but there, and he knew Cas would smell it too when he passed through. He’d smell it, and he’d worry, and Dean would have to circle back to find him anyway.

He was only a mile or so away now. He could make it before Cas caught him.

Dean pushed on, gaining his speed back, taking all the familiar twists and turns he took all those years ago. It was home, after all, for a time. He’d get up in the mornings and go out to hunt, he’d walk the mile or so to the creek for water. On really hot days, there was a river a couple miles in the opposite direction. 

When he emerged from the trees again, it was onto a road riddled with potholes, years since it’d seen any sort of care. Dean turned and followed it south, paws thudding against the asphalt, nails scraping the rock. 

The gas station looked almost like a mirage in the distance, rising out of rock and dust with each lunge forward. It was missing another front window pane and the sign had completely fallen from its hinges, but overall it was the same as when he’d left. His port in the storm. His home, the only sense of safety he’d ever had before he met Cas. Where he’d grown, hidden,  _ survived _ . Where he’d lost the only thing that ever mattered to him up until that point.

Dean gradually slowed as he approached, sides heaving from the exertion of the run, tongue lolling out as he panted. He eventually stopped, sniffing at the ground, tail twitching back and forth behind him as he took in the scents. Mostly made up of wild game; rabbits and deer and even a small pack of wild wolves. Brethren, as close as shifters had, anyway. 

He looked up and cocked his head, ears perked forward. There was nothing around except Cas, quickly closing the distance between them. The grass was wild and overgrown, some weeds almost as tall as the collapsing building itself. 

Dean sat and pawed at the cracked pavement, turning his head as Cas approached. They licked in greeting, Cas playfully nipping an ear for making him chase his Omega. He turned and looked at the gas station, recognizing it almost immediately from Dean’s descriptions. The Omega had never offered to show him, and Cas had never asked. 

Withoutpreamble, Dean stood and trotted to the old door. Cas followed behind him and Dean could sense the slight worry from the Alpha. Dean didn’t feel anything but morbid curiosity, though. The place brought back memories, of course, but he was stronger than those now. He was beyond his past. 

Still, maybe if Cas saw it from his own eyes, he’d get a better picture of what it had really been like. 

The scent inside was old. Still faintly of him, but faded greatly. The crumbling walls were still covered in his chaotic scribbles. Old shelves were filled with out-of-date food and a few canned goods that Dean had never gotten around to eating. They were difficult to open. Hunting had often been easier. 

Along with his scent, faint but unmistakable, was his blood. After he’d miscarried, he’d cleaned up what he could, but some of the mess had simply been left there to dry. Dean stood behind the counter, the old register dusty and smashed, and looked down at the stain he’d left behind. 

Cas had stopped on the far end of the counter, his tail hanging motionless between his back legs, head down, blue eyes on Dean. Dean tried to remember the pain he felt that day, emotionally and physically, as he lay alone on the cold floor, but he was having trouble remembering it the way he once could. He felt oddly detached from the space, from the actual sight in front of him, strangely...at peace with what had happened.

He stared down at the floor unseeingly for so long, that he barely noticed when Cas stepped forward and slowly nuzzled his neck, ultimately brushing his entire body up against Dean’s before turning back to the stain. He whined softly, lowered himself to his belly, his nose only inches away. His ears and tail drooped and he almost looked small for once, sad eyes looking up at Dean.

Dean shifted his gaze slightly to Cas when he saw him inching forward, long tongue darting out to lick absently at the floor. He lapped gently a few more times before slowly standing and nuzzling Dean’s neck again, behind his ear, a little more overzealous than normal. He continued nuzzling, nipping, pressing, until he’d finally encouraged Dean to lay down, and he laid beside him, draping his head over Dean’s back. 

Dean laid his head between his own paws, gaze trained on the offensive stain, struggling to feel anything other than the overwhelming warmth radiating from Cas all the way through to his core. Cas was making a sound, something akin to purring, and if Dean wasn’t careful it could easily lull him to sleep. He didn’t want to wake up here, that was for sure. Not again.

They lay like that for a long while, Cas silent and steady, a strong comfort and anchor. Dean kept expecting his emotions to bubble up, to have some mental meltdown and once again grieve over the pup he never knew. To lick those old scars and remember the pain, the fear, the utter loneliness. None of it came. Even amongst the ruin of his old life, the scent of his dead young, he felt only peace. It was done. He had a new life now with an Alpha that could only be described as perfect, four pups, his long-lost brother and yes...even the mother that had left him behind. While he would always wonder about the pup that never got the chance to be, he refused to wallow in that pain any longer.

Eventually he stood, Cas following his lead, and explored the rest of the small building. He hadn’t left much behind, carrying most of his belongings in that bag he’d had when he’d stumbled into Eden. The only things he’d left behind were the few supplies he’d had to draw and paint with. Old cans of spray paint, long since dried up, some fragments of chalk, and stubby crayons. He sniffed at them, remembering those restless nights of scribbling on the walls and floors. 

He lifted his head and watched Cas slowly take it all in. The life of his mate before they’d known each other. Some of the drawings and paintings were angry, chaotic, indecipherable, even to Dean. He could recall some of the emotions, but the meanings of some of these pictures were lost to him now. Perhaps they’d never even had a meaning. Just raw emotion coming out in the only safe way Dean could release them.

Some were crude drawings of his lost pup, a lump vaguely in the shape of a baby. It had been the only way he could mourn. Tears were dangerous back then. Dehydration, starvation, had always been close by.

Dean left Cas to look and found his old fire pit. His fishing pole that had been little more than a stick with string. Old, worn out clothes that he had left simply because there just wasn’t enough left of them to justify carrying. Discarded bones from rabbits, squirrels, even a deer or two when he’d gotten lucky.

And...yes. She was still there. Though how could she not be? She didn’t run.

Dean’s tail wagged as he jogged out the back door, his claws clicking on the pavement as he approached what could only be described as a big, black rust bucket. He couldn’t read back then, so he’d never known the make or model of the vehicle, but she was still beautiful to him. He could tell she’d been a muscle car with an engine that purred. He could picture her roaring down the street, a black streak, beautiful and classic. 

Her former glory was long gone, along with every other piece of technology. The tires were rotted, gone. The paint was all but flaked off, the metal beneath slowly rusting out. A door was missing, the seats were nothing but cracked, sun-bleached leather. Windows were busted, as were some of the lights. The hood was bent to hell, the engine dead and the gas dried up. Dean was never sure why he liked the piece of crap so much, but she had this... _ something _ that he couldn’t put his finger on. He just knew that when he’d stumble back, barely alive, clutching a sad little rabbit to his chest as his only food for who knew how long, he’d see this car and it would feel like he was home.

He hopped into the front seat and laid down, and eventually Cas made his way out back and joined him, squeezing into the space between Dean and the back of the seat so he could lay his head over Dean’s back again. It was his go-to position while in this form; his own way of feeling like he still had some control over Dean’s protection, Dean assumed. He didn’t mind it. It made him feel safe.

His full transition had happened nearly three years ago now. Their chase had been a successful one, resulting in two healthy pups. Dean had been disappointed halfway through the pregnancy to find not only that he was already almost as big as he was at full term with Jack, but there had been no signs of the shifting lore being true. Cas seemed disappointed initially, but he got over it much quicker than Dean did. 

However, the night of the birth, everything changed.

It was instinct, Dean knows now, for him to disappear into the woods when his labor started. He walked alone until the pain became too much for him to continue, and he hunkered down in a cave on one of the far ends of the property. Cas had left for a last-minute hunting trip, for something for Dean to consume after the birth that wasn’t the usual chicken or pork. But as Dean laid in the floor of the cave, head propped up on a rock, panting and sweating as the first contraction strong enough to encourage pushing hit, he heard Cas’s howl.

By the time Cas found him, he was already holding their first pup in his arms.

Luna and Sunniva were born barely seven minutes apart, both red-faced and wailing, and suddenly Dean and Cas were the proud parents of a total of four exceptional pups.

His first full transition happened that night.

Jack, being only four years old, was understandably disappointed at the idea of being outnumbered by his sisters. Especially since 10-year-old Rory- or  _ Aurora,  _ as she currently preferred to be called- was too old and too cool for her annoying little brother. In fact, Rory spent most of her time either at Charlie’s or with the Banes’, finding both of her parents too dull for her company. Dean assured Cas that her behavior was only temporary, but poor Cas didn’t seem so sure.

Secretly, Dean wasn’t so sure, either. He missed the little girl that would follow him around like a duckling, desperate for the attention of someone she considered a mom even before she had known it herself. Now it seemed Rory had very little time for Dean or Cas. She’d even stopped teaching Dean to read, now too impatient with his - in her opinion-slow progress. It was all perfectly natural, every Omega had assured him. Pups get to  _ that age _ when they wanted nothing to do with you. It would pass, just like every other phase.

Dean just hoped it passed soon.

Not that he had any shortage on pups. Jack was clingy, sticking to Dean’s side almost constantly. He was quiet, though. A thoughtful pup. Curious. Always observing, taking things in, learning silently. Dean rarely had to fuss at him for anything. Luna and Sunniva were rambunctious, constantly getting into mischief. They kept Dean and Missouri busy and on their toes, and Cas exasperated. With four pups, the Alpha was starting to show his age somewhat. He tired more easily, lost patience more often. It was part of the reason they had decided on this vacation. Dean needed time away from being a mom and Cas needed time away from being pack Alpha on top of being a dad. For this time together, they were simply mates. Alpha and Omega.

Dean sighed contently and shifted under his Alpha’s weight, enjoying the heat and solidness of Cas above him. His new wolf body had taken some time to get used to, to even learn how to use. Walking on all fours, while perfectly natural now, had taken some effort at first. He was smaller than Cas, but still bigger than a wild wolf. His color much was lighter as well. A soft, golden brown with subtle markings of darker tans with a white muzzle and belly, and brown flecks across his face. Dean had thought he was dull-looking, a plain brown wolf, but Cas seemed utterly enthralled by him. He was constantly praising Dean’s beautiful coat, his soft colors, his forest eyes. Dean stopped arguing a long time ago and just let the Alpha believe whatever he wanted.

Cas lifted his head and started slowly licking at Dean’s ear, occasionally nibbling, grooming him like he always did when they ran together. He moved to his muzzle, soft wet kisses, until Dean was practically purring himself.

Being able to run with Cas was one of his favorite things. It was exciting, exhilarating, and it always brought them closer on a level Dean still didn’t fully understand. He and Cas were able to read each other easier in this form, like its own form of telepathy without actual words in their heads. When they ran together it was almost as if they were connected by a tether, moving in sync, bobbing and weaving in unison. 

They weren’t expected back for a few more days, if they wanted them, but Dean was already desperately missing their pups. Judging by Cas’s underlying vibes, he was too. 

Being at this place with Cas, for the first time since he’d made his journey to Eden, felt strangely comforting. A chance to mourn his lost pup without fear, and ultimately, without pain or unending sadness. Just a life that never came to be, and as he paid his respects, Cas cleaned his wounds.

He dozed as Cas groomed him, the sun starting to set and the world slowly darkening around them. It was strange how peaceful this place was now. True, it had been his sanctuary for years, but it had never been relaxing. Never felt completely safe. Now, here with Cas, his newfound strength and confidence, he felt no fear. No underlying anxiety.

When Dean woke, it was completely dark. He yawned and realized he had shifted back to his human form. Keeping the wolf form while he slept was still tricky. 

“Omega.”

Dean smiled and turned his head, meeting deep blue eyes. Cas was still on top of him, casually running his fingers up and down Dean’s spine. 

“Alpha…” Dean murmured. “How long was I out?”

“Mm, not long,” Cas smiled, leaning down to kiss Dean gently. “I watched you sleep. You’re beautiful when you sleep.”

“You think I’m beautiful when I do anything,” Dean teased with a chuckle.

“Just stating a fact, my love.”

“Uh huh,” Dean rolled his eyes.

“You like this car,” Cas observed, glancing around the interior.

“Been here as long as I have,” Dean said, picking at a hole in the seat. “I could tell it used to be beautiful. One of those classics, you know? Left out here alone, to rot away, no one taking care of it…”

“It reminds you of yourself.”

Dean paused then huffed a small laugh. “Yeah. Guess so.”

Cas smiled again and ran a hand over the cracked seat, humming softly. “I like it, too. You’re right. She’s beautiful. A shame she had to be left here.”

“Wish I knew how to fix her,” Dean sighed. 

“Even if you did,” Cas murmured, “you still wouldn’t be able to. This is an old one. Parts are hard enough to come by...parts for a classic would be impossible.”

“I know,” Dean said softly. “Just...wish I could.”

“Perhaps you could draw her.”

Dean frowned up at him. “I’m not sure I could do her justice.”

“Nonsense.”

Dean chuckled, looking over as he ran a hand up Cas’s forearm, pulling gently at a few hairs. “Maybe Rory would help me.”

Cas pressed his lips together, giving Dean a tight smile. “I’m sure she would, if we could pull her away from Max and Alicia for a day. Maybe entice her with the promise of a day at the lake, just the three of us.”

“I think she needs that.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah,” Dean sighed. “I mean, it was hard on her after Jack was born, not being the center of attention anymore. And with the presentation and the twins and now the hormones-”

“Don’t remind me.”

“-I’m sure she’s feeling...overlooked, at times. It’s time-consuming, being the parents of three kids under the age of five. She doesn’t require as much care anymore, so it’s easy for us to become too preoccupied with the younger ones that we...maybe don’t spend as much time paying attention to what she has going on.”

Cas’s brow furrowed and the corners of his eyes drooped. He heaved a deep sigh, followed by a defeated groan. “Have we become  _ those  _ parents, Omega?”

“‘Fraid so, Alpha.”

“Then we’ll rectify it.” Cas leaned down and pressed a kiss to Dean’s chest, then a few more down his torso, shifting his weight to his knees as he moved further down. Dean grinned and arched under him, fisting a hand into his hair. 

“My god, sometimes I truly wonder how I’m able to keep myself from mounting you several times a day. My willpower must be even stronger than I thought.” Cas nosed at Dean’s inner thigh, nipping lightly. “And you’re not even in heat. You’re damn irresistible then.”

“Or maybe you’ve just gotten bored with me,” Dean huffed, a smile on his lips, knowing full well that wasn’t the case. If there was one thing that he could count on, it was Cas’s inexplicable infatuation with him. The Alpha wanted him. Always.

“Impossible,” Cas said sincerely, purring as he nuzzled and licked his way up Dea’s inner thigh. Dean sighed happily and draped his legs open as much as he could, giving his mate full access. The Alpha growled in approval, immediately burying his face in between the Omega’s legs to taste his sweetness. 

“You’re my addiction,” Cas went on, his tongue lapping gently at Dean’s twitching hole. A slow trickle of slick leaked out, Cas’s pink tongue ready and waiting to lick it up with greedy swipes. “I can’t get enough, Omega. Your scent, your taste, the sound of your voice...I can’t imagine living without you now. I think back on the day you walked into my camp, into my life, and think of how lucky I was. So unsuspecting. But I could smell you the moment you entered my territory...and I wanted you then and there.” Cas paused and lifted his head, his lips glistening with Dean’s slick. “You have no idea how hard it was not to pin you down when you walked into my cabin, how much my fangs ached to sink into your neck...to claim you in front of Benny. In front of everyone.”

Dean shuddered. “Not for lack of attraction, but...I’m really glad you didn’t do that.”

“I was well-aware of your wariness. You would’ve torn me to shreds.”

“I would’ve tried.”

“You would’ve succeeded. I wouldn’t have dared to put a malicious mark on you.” Cas turned his head to press a kiss to Dean’s inner thigh, wet with his slick. Then his tongue was on Dean’s hole again and Dean’s hand flew to the Alpha’s hair, gripping a handful. Cas growled against his hole, sending vibrations through his body, his hands tightening on Dean’s thighs as he squirmed.

Cas sat up as much as he could on his knees in the car, hooking his hands under the back of Dean’s knees to pull him close. His cock was already standing at attention, the head red and wet, and he barely took a moment to pause before lining himself up and pushing slowly inside.

Dean let out a strangled sound and arched against the bench seat, the cracked leather groaning beneath him. Cas filled him up so  _ full _ ; anything and everything inside Dean belonged wholeheartedly to him, and that space was no exception. Recently there were times when making love that Dean felt so consumed by Cas, he was afraid the man would seep through his pores and they’d become one combined being. Cas explained it was their mating bond, made more intense by their shared shifting bond. They spent so much time in each other’s heads these days, it was hard to tell where one of their thoughts began and the other’s ended.

“Sing to it,  _ Omega _ ,” Cas whispered above him, rocking his hips slow and hard, in and out. He reached down, tracing Dean’s lip with a finger. “The moon, this place, your loss. Sing to it. Let them know your story.”

Dean learned a long time ago that there was no holding back when he was with Cas like this. Emotions overflowed, arousal heightened, and his normally quiet nature shattered. Now that his Alpha was in his head, when they joined as one like this, it was impossible to keep anything locked away. So when Cas told him to sing, he did. He didn’t hesitate. For the first time in years, they were truly alone. He could let down every wall, open himself completely, and trust that Cas would keep him safe. 

He was hoarse with it by the time Cas locked inside him, both of them howling to the moon hanging above, the two wolves just under their skin howling with them. Dean clung to Cas tightly, his claws digging into skin, fangs biting down so he could taste Alpha on his tongue. Cas growled lowly, dangerously, and Dean welcomed the brief pain of his fangs sinking into the mating mark on his neck. There was an explosion of pleasure. Dean felt his own, but also Cas’s, felt that knot pulsing against his rim, hot semen pumping him full. He came with another howl, arching beneath Cas, his body and senses humming.

When he became aware, Cas was purring loudly as he lapped up the blood on Dean’s neck. His knot was buried deep, still pulsing, and Dean groaned with utter contentment. 

“My beautiful Omega,” Cas murmured, nuzzling, grooming, his inner wolf growling happily. Dean knew this because it was like a loud engine in his head. “Part of me wishes we could just stay here.”

“My pups,” Dean muttered, eyes closed as the Alpha worked at his neck.

“I’m well aware, love,” Cas chuckled. “Can’t keep mama away for too long.”

“Mmm...I get it, though,” Dean sighed, turning his head to nuzzle at Cas’s neck and breathe in his scent. “It’s been...nice. Just being us.”

They just didn’t get time like this anymore. It was probably for the best at this point, really, because Cas had such a difficult time keeping his hands off and they were too overrun with young inquisitive pups to even entertain the idea of more anytime soon. But it made things difficult because kids meant divided attention, and divided attention unfortunately meant that often Dean and Cas’s attentions came last, if at all. 

When Benny and Tasha welcomed their first pup together the previous year, Benny suggested that he use his newfound freedom since Sam’s induction as secondary pack Alpha to start a daycare with Tasha for all the young pups during the day. Jody, Donna, and Kevin excitedly agreed to assist a few days a week, and so Cas made the order for the school to be built. 

Although Rory was technically too old to go, she spent many days down at the schoolhouse with the Banes twins. Jack went almost daily, and in less than a year Luna and Sunniva would be able to go. But it was the in-between moments that Dean and Cas had to find each other again, to exhibit love and affection not based on child-rearing or domestic duties. Just as lovers, mates, as Alpha and Omega, two halves of a whole. 

But running together...that was a completely different experience. It was effortless.

“We can head back whenever you’re ready,” Cas said softly, and Dean only then realized how long he’d been daydreaming, Cas’s knot having let go at some point. Cas still laid on top of him, stroking his jaw idly, studying him.

Dean thought for a moment, staring up at Cas’s eyes, knowing his Alpha was staring right into his soul and not the least bit uncomfortable with that. There had been a time when Cas’s unwavering gaze had made him squirm. A time when having those eyes on him made him both terrified and excited. It was truly amazing how far they’d come.

“One more day,” Dean said softly. “One more day of just you and me. Then we go back.”

Cas smiled and nodded. “Whatever you wish, Omega.”

\---

Castiel trotted slowly behind Dean, black tail wagging, leaves crunching under his paws as they ambled their way through the forest. The camp was close by, the smell of food cooking and the sound of pups laughing reaching the Alpha’s ears long before they ever saw the gates. Dean was up ahead, eager to get back to his pups, leaving the old Alpha behind. Cas didn’t mind. He enjoyed watching his mate’s wolf body weave through the trees, prance and jump over logs, his form perfect in every way. It hadn’t taken Dean long at all to grow accustomed to his shifted form. Cas wasn’t surprised. Dean was always meant to be a wolf, the genes tucked away and waiting to be woken. Turned out all it took was a lot of Alpha wolf sperm and a pup or two.

The thought of the chase had Cas twitching with arousal. Dean must have caught the scene because he paused and turned his head briefly, giving Cas a clear ‘are you kidding me?’ look before continuing on. Cas just huffed in amusement and followed, ears pricking when the gates of the compound came into view.

Their land was easily twice as large now, the pack growing every year. The gates had been extended, strengthened, and new buildings stood within. Eden’s reputation had spread and soon after eradicating the Omega ring, more Omegas had shown to seek shelter. To escape from whatever hell they’d been living in. Cas never turned any of them away. Most of the Omegas from the ring had chosen to stay along with their pups, more comfortable under the watchful eyes of Cas and Sam, rather than out there on their own. A few had left against Dean’s insistence that they were safe now, saying that an Omega could never be safe while in an Alpha’s territory. It had upset Dean to watch Omegas leave, dragging their sickly pups with them, knowing full well that likely only death waited for them outside the gates. Cas, for his own sanity, had simply let it roll off his shoulders. It was unfortunate, but ultimately their choice. He couldn’t save everyone.

Dean ducked into one of the small huts just outside the gates as the electricity popped at the gate began to slowly swing open. Cas ducked in after him, finding Dean almost fully shifted back to his human form. Cas followed suit, and the two of them dressed in the clothes they’d left prior to their trip, trading soft touches and kisses in between.

Cas stepped out of the hut and held his hand out for Dean to take, giving it a squeeze as he led his mate through the front gates. Benny greeted them on the other side with a smile, his large hands wrapped tightly around Jack’s ankles as the boy sat upon his shoulders. His brown hair, lightened with age, was getting long and flopped onto his forehead, almost into his eyes, which lit up brilliantly when he spotted them, a few shades of lighter blue than Cas’s.

Benny sat the boy down before he had the chance to fall off and Jack closed the distance between them, throwing himself into Dean’s arms.

“Mama!”

“Hey, baby,” Dean said through a grin, wrapping his arms around their son as he clung tightly to him. He felt Cas close in behind him, one of his arms winding around Dean’s waist, the other rubbing Jack’s back.

Jack buried his face in Dean’s neck for a few seconds before holding his arms out to Cas, and Cas took him as they started through the small town on the way up to their cabin on the hill. 

“Good to have you back, boss. Dean.” Benny nodded to him.

“Good to be back,” Cas said softly, his chin hooked over Jack’s shoulder, the boy’s arms thrown around his neck. “Anything to report?”

Benny shook his head. “Nah. Been quiet here. Made some more progress on that row of cabins, looks like they’ll be finished in two to three weeks, ‘f’all goes well.”

“How was Rory?” Dean asked hesitantly, glancing at Jack, who now looked to be dozing on Cas’s shoulder.

Benny huffed a laugh. “She was good. She’s fine, guys. She’s gonna be a teen soon. Hangin’ with your parents ain’t fun anymore. Rest assured she’s a good kid, and that’s ‘cause ‘a you two. Ain’t nothin’ to worry ‘bout.”

“Of course,” Cas murmured, his eyes somewhat downcast as he regarded the dozing Jack in his arms. Dean sighed softly, falling into step next to his mate as they entered the camp. It was a whirlwind of activity, Betas and Omegas going about their daily tasks, pups running around, livestock being herded, more cabins being raised. The pack was twice as big and twice as busy, everyone having a job and performing that job happily. For the most part, things ran smoothly. Dean always said this was thanks to Cas’s leadership and Sam’s relentless work ethic. Cas just thought it was because his pack was made up of strong, capable men and women. His presence was not what made the pack the strong, despite what his Omega said.

“Where is she?” Cas asked, his voice at what he hoped was a level tone.

“Daycare,” Benny grunted, wordlessly stepping over a gaggle of giggling pups as they rolled by in wrestling heap. “She likes helpin’ out there, you know.”

“We could go see her,” Dean offered up carefully.

“No need,” Cas said with a shrug. “She’ll come home eventually.”

They walked by the edge of the newly-created ranch and Jack excitedly pointed out the horses grazing. The ranch had been Dean’s idea and Cas had run with it. Keeping vehicles operating was a monumental task. They had acquired a bus a few years ago along with an old Dodge truck, but they seldom used them. Fuel, parts, upkeep-it was all a nearly impossible task. They were used in strict emergencies. Dean, however, had decided that everyday travel needed to become easier for the pack. Especially the Betas who patrolled the area and were sent on scouting trips for supplies. Horses were the answer, easier than keeping a bus fueled and working, and much faster than travelling on foot.

The damn hill was just as much of a pain in the ass as it was the first time Dean ever climbed it, but at least now it had a simple stone walkway up and around to the back door. It didn’t make the climb that much easier except when it rained, but it was much more aesthetically pleasing. Dean, Cas, and Jack spent the better part of two days lugging rocks and pressing them into the earth earlier that year.

Cas pulled ahead of him with Jack’s head bouncing against his shoulder with every step, the boy now fast asleep. It was close to naptime anyway, Dean figured, judging by the time since sunrise and its current position in the sky. If the twins weren’t already down, Missouri would be putting them down soon.

Benny followed them up to the porch, like he always did when any of them returned from outside of the gates, and when Cas disappeared inside Benny gently tugged at Dean’s arm.

“Chief, got a minute?”

Dean looked back toward Cas, nodding to him. “You gonna put him to bed?”

Cas paused and regarded them for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, I’ve got him.”

Dean pressed his lips together and nodded, pulling the door shut behind them. “This about Hannah again? Listen, if she ran off again, just leave food in the safehouse for her like that last couple of times and she’ll end up coming back if she wants-”

“Not her, boss. Rory.”

Dean tilted his head and crossed his arms over his chest. “Did something happen?”

“Nah, nothin’ like that. She just…” Benny took off his hat and bent the brim between his hands, clearing his throat. “She really was good, she always is. But I overheard her with Tash one day this week, about Ysabella. They were doin’ all their art stuff and she said that Bella talked about drawin’ all the time in her journal. Said she’d never seen any of ‘em, Cas never told her ‘bout ‘em. I thought he read that journal with ‘er?”

Dean sighed, dropping his arms by his sides. “He did. But he didn’t really...I don’t know. He tried, Benny. I really think he did. But it was hard on him...you remember. And he was...really angry, for a long time, and he was gone a lot ‘cause of that, and...I just really don’t want to force him to talk about it if it gets him like that.”

Benny looked up at him and nodded subtly, scraping his teeth over his bottom lip as he put his hat back on his head. “I wouldn’t say nothin’ if-”

“If you didn’t think it was important. Yeah, I know, Benny.” Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly before looking back at Benny. “She needs someone to talk to.”

“I think so.”

“It’s gotta be him.”

“No one knew her better. ‘Cept maybe Charlie, but I think that girl needs to hear it from her dad.”

“You think it’ll help?”

Benny hesitated before quirking a smile. “I think our girl needs to know-  _ deserves  _ to know- that part of her. I think they need to have that conversation together. And I think just as much that Cas still has shit he needs to get off his chest, and he may as well work through that at the benefit of his daughter. It’s an important age. Girl needs her daddy.”

“Problem is getting Cas to open up about all of it,” Dean sighed, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he glanced into the window of their cabin. “He won’t talk about it, Benny. Even with me. Even after all this time, after what we’ve been through...I know there’s things I don’t know. Any time I try to bring it up, he dances around the subject. Grabs a joint and smokes.”

“He’s an Alpha,” Benny snorted. “They’re notoriously stubborn.”

“Don’t gotta tell me,” Dean rolled his eyes. “Try living with one.”

“No thanks.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Dean murmured. “He’s got so much on his plate already…”

“Cas is a good Alpha,” Benny said carefully. “A good leader. And not that I have personal experience, but I’d say he’s a good mate too.”

Dean had to agree with that.

“But fatherhood was more or less forced on him,” Benny continued, tilting his head. “Not that he didn’t want a pup, but he’d planned to have his mate with him when he did. Ysabella died and he...was lost for a long time. I think he may have even resented Rory for a while, but even more I think he resented himself. As a dad, Cas needs some work.”

“There’s no manual on raising pups,” Dean murmured, unable to stop himself from defending his Alpha.

“Damn right,” Benny snorted a laugh. “But he ain’t living what he preaches, Chief. He got you to open up about everything, right?”

Dean swallowed and nodded. “Y-yeah. Eventually.”

“And yet.”

Dean sighed and nodded. “And yet he won’t.”

“Just sayin’.”

“He’s a good dad.”

“We both know I ain’t debatin’ that.”

Dean didn’t say anything right away, so Benny shrugged and shook his head. “There’s anyone that can get through to ‘im, it’s you. You always been his weakness. And if there’s anyone worth ‘im pullin’ his head outta his ass for, it’s you and them pups. Especially Rory.”

Dean nodded, chewing his bottom lip. “Yeah. I’ll talk to ‘im, Benny.”

Benny took a step back into a casual almost half-bow, before turning to leave. “Later, Chief.”

“See ya.”

Dean watched Benny retreat down the hill, until he was almost at the bottom of the stone path, before letting himself into the house. 

All was quiet, so Missouri must have the twins at her cottage across the way. Dean hoped, for her sake, that they’d been tired enough to nap, but they were few and far between these days. 

The cabin was close to three times the original size with the additions they’d completed over the years. Rory’s room was upgraded in the first addition and Jack’s nursery moved to Rory’s old room, Cas and Dean now actually had a bedroom instead of a bed in the middle of the living space. The second addition was completed within weeks of the twins’ birth, and suddenly their one bedroom cabin was a four bedroom cabin...with room to expand, if they wanted it.

Dean hadn’t decided if he did or not yet.

He gazed longingly at Rory’s bedroom, the door open a crack, some of her clothes strewn across her bed and in her floor. The raggedy stocking cap was tossed halfway underneath her bed. He swallowed hard and turned into Jack’s room, finding Cas laying in his bed with Jack draped halfway across his chest. 

“Is it Hannah again?” Cas whispered.

Dean shook his head as he silently toed off his shoes, crawling into bed with them on Cas’s other side. Cas wrapped an arm around him, and Dean raised a finger to brush strands of Jack’s light hair out of his pale face. 

“He been asleep this whole time?”

Cas nodded.

“It’s your scent. It’s calming.”

“His scenting hasn’t come in yet.”

“Doesn’t mean you don’t smell good anyway.” Dean smiled against his chest, nuzzling gently.

“Hey.” Cas reached down as well as he could and nudged Dean’s chin up with a fingertip, meeting his eyes. “We’ll talk about it later?”

“Yes, Alpha.”

He wasn’t sure how long they laid there before he fell asleep, and he wasn’t sure how long after that Cas gently shook him awake. Jack was now curled up under the covers with a thumb in his mouth and his hair flopped onto his forehead, knees drawn up toward his chest. Cas laid a hand on the boy’s head and Dean kissed his forehead, then they slipped quietly out of the room. 

Cas took Dean’s hand and led him to their room, shutting the door behind them and slowly pressing Dean into it, hands on his hips as he pressed their lips together.

Dean wanted to object for the sole purpose of having their talk before things went too far, but not as much as he wanted to return the favor. He opened up willingly and sighed when Cas’s tongue slid against his, hands tightening on his waist. Dean canted his hips and Cas groaned in response, pulling back just enough to fumble at the button on Dean’s jeans.

“Mm, Cas, wait, we need to-”

He was cut short by a gasp when Cas relieved him of his jeans and boxers and dropped to his knees, taking him in his mouth. His head fell back against the door with a  _ thunk _ and he closed his eyes, hands fisting in Cas’s hair. Cas took him all in, over and over again, sucking and bobbing his head, working a hand over the shaft.

“ _ Fuck,  _ Alpha, please...need...to…”

Cas growled as he got back to his feet and forced Dean’s shirt over his head, gripping the back of his thighs as he easily lifted his Omega and carried him to the bed.

“Cas-”

Dean uttered a soft  _ oof  _ as Cas dropped him onto his back on the bed, already feeling heavy between his legs where his slick was preparing him for his Alpha’s knot. Cas hurriedly relieved himself of his own clothes, Dean sitting up to help him with his pants when he felt Cas was taking too long. Cas slid inside without preamble, sinking deep into Dean with one long push. He was barely sheathed before he began a steady rhythm, fast enough to eventually make them both come but slow enough for them to really enjoy each other.

“I know what you’re...going to say,” Cas managed between kisses, an arm framed around Dean’s head, a hand on his waist. “I already know.” 

“Will you do it for me? For us?” Dean asked breathlessly, tugging at Cas’s hair, pulling his head back to stare into those blue eyes.

“I’d do anything for you,” Cas said very sincerely. “For all of you.”

“I’ll be here to help,” Dean said softly, reaching up to trace Cas’s lip when the Alpha slowed his hips. “I want to help. She’s my pup too.”

“Every bit so.”

“And I want to help  _ you.” _

Cas paused. “I don’t need-”

“Save it.” Dean tugged hard on Cas’s hair, successfully pulling him down to the bed to roll on top of him. Cas settled into the bed as Dean guided his hands to his hips and sunk down onto his swelling knot, setting a steady pace, lifting himself up to sink back down again. “You’ll let me help you, Castiel. Because despite you being my Alpha, you are my  _ mate.  _ You took care of me when I needed you, you helped me heal, you got me through my shit. Now let me help you through yours.”

“ _ Dean. _ ”

Cas’s eyes flashed and he almost looked angry, but Dean wasn’t afraid. He wouldn’t back down.

Dean rode him harder, letting his head fall back, his eyes rolled back in his head, a low moan escaping his throat. Cas’s nails dug into his hips, spurring him on as his knot began popping past Dean’s rim, a growl rumbling deep in his chest. 

“I won’t let you avoid it anymore, Alpha,” Dean said lowly, his eyes flashing, briefly showing his inner wolf. It was a challenge and, for anyone else, would be incredibly disrespectful. A slight at Cas’s authority. For Dean, his position as mate granted him certain leeway. Not to mention he didn’t put up with much of Cas’s Alpha shit anyway. Not if it impeded with their relationship or their relationship with their children.

“Omega,” Cas warned, claws biting in, his lips curling to show a glimpse of fangs.

“I’m going to help you,” Dean said, not backing down despite his instincts telling him otherwise. He paused, sunk down on Cas’s knot, and rolled his hips slowly. He watched the Alpha pant and squirm, bucking to drive himself in impossibly deeper. “You’re going to open up to me,” Dean continued, rolling his hips forward, gyrating. “You’re going to open up to our daughter. You’re not going to hide yourself anymore. You healed me. It’s time to heal you, Alpha.”

Dean rode him hard then, fast, rough, the bed creaking and the headboard smacking against the wall. There had been a time when Dean would have cared about someone hearing them, especially Missouri, but he hardly gave it a thought anymore. Sex with his Alpha was natural, beautiful and more than what he ever thought he’d get out of life. He would enjoy every second and not hold back a single sound.

Cas’s knot swelled and stuck, pulling the Alpha’s first orgasm from him with a loud gasp. Cas arched beneath Dean, looking so fucking beautiful that Dean almost forgot about his own orgasm while he stared down at him. He painted ribbons across Cas’s stomach and chest, seed splattering across all that kissable tan skin. He felt the knot pulsing inside, filling him up, his channel clamping down to soak up every drop. He shuddered, the feeling of his Alpha’s release deep inside making his whole body hum with pleasure. He would never get tired of it. Would always crave it.

“You may be Alpha,” Dean murmured, quietly watching Cas fight to catch his breath, mouth hanging open and those huge fangs glinting. “But I’m  _ your _ Omega. And we both know at the end of the day, I call the shots.”

“You sure do,” Cas replied breathlessly, sliding a hand up to the back of Dean’s neck to pull him roughly down against him and crush their lips together. He bucked up, pressing himself deep, pulling a soft yelp from Dean. In one swift movement he flipped them and pressed Dean into the bed, sweaty foreheads sliding against one another as Cas stared into his eyes, the light dancing around the irises. “Did Benny or Missouri put you up to this?”

“Neither,” Dean said honestly, staring right back. “Benny just confirmed what I already knew. I shoulda talked to you a long time ago.”

Cas’s eyes searched his face for a long moment and he finally pulled back, features softening. He reached up slowly and stroked along Dean’s cheekbone with the tip of his pointer finger.

“You worry.”

“Of course I worry.”

Cas tilted his head and furrowed his brow, pressing his lips together. “I’ve read the diary with her, Dean. Just like you asked. I’m not sure what else you want from me.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “You know damn well what I  _ want _ , Cas. Reading her words isn’t the same thing as knowing her. You’re the only one of us who truly did. You’re the only one of us who can tell Rory who she is. It’s not Charlie’s place, or Missouri’s. It’s  _ yours. _ ”

“Dean, I…” Cas chewed his lip, looking away. “I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because I...Dean, I loved Ysabella. I did. I loved her with everything I had in me, but…it wasn’t perfect.  _ We  _ weren’t perfect. And there have been times, especially since Jack’s birth...where I wonder if maybe she’d still be alive if she hadn’t met me. Maybe if I hadn’t pursued her, maybe if I...maybe if I’d listened, maybe if I hadn’t been so consumed with how I felt about her. Maybe if I hadn’t mated with her, maybe if we’d walked away...maybe-”

“Don’t do that.”

Cas sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Aurora is perceptive. She’ll know something is wrong if I talk about Ysabella. I can’t let her think I didn’t love her. I did. But ultimately I killed her Dean, and I can’t help thinking she’d still be here if I hadn’t worked so hard to make her be with me. She could’ve lived a long, happy life with someone better suited for her, if I’d just let her go. If I hadn’t been so selfish.”

“You didn’t  _ make  _ her be with you, Cas-”

“With all due respect, Dean, you weren’t there-”

“Did you force her down?” Dean demanded, staring down at Cas with a blank expression. “Did you rape her? Did you threaten her?”

Cas’s eyes widened into a horrified expression. “What? Dean,  _ no _ -”

“Then you didn’t make her do anything,” Dean shrugged. “If she had truly wanted to walk away, to say no, to leave you, she would have. And you would’ve let her. Because I know you, Castiel. You never would have forced an Omega to be with you, no matter how much you wanted them.”

“I relentlessly pursued her, Dean,” Cas murmured, swallowing hard. “I let my Alpha desires run wild. I knew, deep down, we weren’t suited for each other. But I still wanted her. I knew the risks of pregnancy, especially with me being a shifter...it’s hard on an Omega’s body. She’s dead because of me, Dean. There’s no getting around that.”

“Pregnancy is difficult no matter what, Cas,” Dean said softly, shifting and pulling at Cas’s knot. They both gasped, another wave of cum gushing inside. “You said it yourself, our bodies have undercompensated. She would’ve been at risk with anyone.”

“I did the same thing to you.”

“ _ Stop it.”  _ Dean pressed a hand firmly against Cas’s mouth, jaw clenched. “I made this decision on my own.”

“After I continued to pursue you-”

“Hardly.” Dean slowly removed his hand in favor of stroking Cas’s scruffy cheek. “I wanted you, too. Stop blaming yourself for everything. You’re really not as bad as you think you are.” 

Cas looked up at Dean’s teasing smile, expression relaxing marginally. 

“Just talk to your daughter, Cas. Be honest with her. Tell her stories. Tell her about her mom in a way she’ll never know just from her journal. And I’ll be here the whole time, to help both of you through it.”

Cas chewed his lip. “I knew this was going to have to happen eventually. I guess I just...I didn’t expect it to be so soon.”

“She’s going through a lot right now, with the hormones and-”

“I know. I haven’t been-”

Dean clicked his tongue and clamped down around Cas’s knot, drawing another hiss from the Alpha. Cas shook his head, chuckling.

“Point taken.”

“You’re too hard on yourself,” Dean said, without missing a beat. He pulled Cas down into an embrace, humming as Cas buried his face in his neck. “This is only going to make you two closer. Maybe even help with her withdrawn behavior lately. She needs this, Cas. You both do.”

Cas sighed tiredly, but he smiled despite himself and huffed a small laugh. “You’re a stubborn one, my Omega.”

“I have to be,” Dean smirked, burying his fingers into Cas’s unruly hair and tugging at the strands gently. “I’m mated to an even more stubborn Alpha.”

“But you love me,” Cas murmured quietly, posing it as almost a question, his fingers tracing patterns into Dean’s chest. No doubt imagining the tattoo he was planning to have put there. Something to commemorate Dean’s transition, to pay homage to the wolf within.

“Yeah, I fucking love you,” Dean growled, tugging a little harder on Cas’s hair. “That’s why I’m makin’ you do this. All that guilt you have, you gotta let it go. You helped me let go of my past. Time to let go of yours.”

Cas’s eyes searched his face, smile fading into a soft line, stoic and sincere.

“After all,” Dean continued, tracing the curve of Cas’s jaw, “we have a second generation Alpha to raise.”


End file.
